June is Pride Month; a time to celebrate identity, love, resistance and resilience. For many it’s about waving a rainbow flag with joy and confidence. But for those of us who are both LGBTQ+ and disabled, Pride can carry an even deeper meaning. It’s not just about loving who we love – it’s about surviving, thriving, and finding pride in every part of who we are, even when the world makes it difficult.
For a long time I struggled with Pride. Not because I was ashamed of being bisexual, or ashamed of my disability – quite on the contrary. My sexuality has always been a non-issue in my family, and I’ve never seen a reason to be ashamed of being born with epilepsia – since It’s not my fault.
However, as an ‘outlier’ in both the queer and the disabled community (that is, I’m not gay or straight enough – and not visibly disabled enough; untill I am too visibly disabled in the midst of seizures), I have often felt very alone. Now, realistically I know I’m not. I also know this feeling is not connected to just these communities. Quite on the contrary, I’ve felt like this any time I join a new community. It’s a feeling of being included but simultaneously being completely on the outside. In many ways it has often felt like I was not made for this world. As one of my favourite writers and feminists, Simone de Beauvoir wrote in her book The Woman Destroyed: «I was made for another planet altogether I mistook the way» (Beauvoir 1967). I completely understand.
Luckily, throughout my life, the fog has gradually lifted.
Like the start of a quiet revolution within me, with age I began to realize that feeling pride wasn’t just about resilience or performing strength. It was about embracing truth.
Being queer and disabled means navigating a world that often sees both identities as tragic or invisible. Too often Pride events aren’t accessible. Too often LGBTQ+ spaces aren’t designed with neurodivergent or psysically disabled folks in mind. But we exist, and we belong. And there’s a power in that intersection. As disability activist Eli Clare writes in Brilliant Imperfection: Grappling with Cure (2017):
Pride means resisting shame. It means rewriting the meaning of body and mind. It means telling our stories on our own terms
-Eli Clare
So what is disabled pride? It’s not about pretending things are easy, but rather about saying: I am me – I am whole, exactly as I am. It’s about finding strengt in community, and about refusing to shrink.
«Disabled Pride 2»
Image by:
Silje Elsrud Yttervik
Disabled pride means celebrating what we’ve learned; resilience, adaptability, emotional intelligence. It means recognizing that our accomplishments may not look like others’, but they are just as real, just as powerful – and just as worthy of pride. Because, as Alice Wong (2020) would say; we are the experts of our own lives.
This Pride Month I’m holding both my bisexuality and my disabilty in the light. I’m choosing to celebrate the beauty of intersectionality. So, if you are queer and disabled: your existence is radical. Your joy and happiness matters. Your story matters. And you are not alone!
-Silje
